Leave Something Good … For Something Better

Follow Your Passion

I have often heard that it is good to follow your passion, do what you love, let go of something that no longer serves you, and move on to something better.  This philosophy carries over into all aspects of life.  Leave the job that provides adequate income and comfort so that you can build on your unique talents and skills.  Break up with your partner once the passion has waned or because of some difficult personality traits to be with someone who currently stimulates your passionate desire or appears to have a much easier temperament.

I am not a huge risk taker and I love to remain in a place where I am comfortable.  But I also do not shy away from challenges and new experiences.  My intention is to live in the flow of life, not making waves unless pushed or pulled into it.  My modus operandi is defnitely not to purposely be controversial.   I love to have a stable environment around me so that I can spend my time focusing on the people and activities I love.

When I started to write this post I searched for some articles about leaving something good for something better.  What I expected to find was a slew of articles encouraging the reader to let go of something good to make room for your passion, your love, and the fulfillment of your dreams.  But to my surprise, I found just the opposite as you can see in the following quotes.

Never leave something good to find something better,
because once you realize you had the best, the best
has found better.  
~Unknown (Drake quote)

“‘Follow your passion’ is crappy advice.” 
~Joshua Fields Millburn

“Not following your passions will ultimately lead
to satisfaction.”  ~Cal Newport

“Don’t do what you love, learn to love what you do….
Not following your passion will ultimately lead to
success….Be patient. Passion comes with
mastery and time.
” ~ Sebastian Klein 

One year ago, the place where I was living and working became increasingly uncomfortable, but true to form I did not easily choose to move until the ceiling in the building hallway actually caved in.  I needed a message so strong that there was no more decision to be made. Living_Room_270x215

My comfortable environment had changed and catapulted me into making  a big move.  This led to a beautiful new space with views of the ocean and a magnificent pool right downstairs where I could relax and feel the ocean breeze in the warm sunshine of Florida.

Then, a few months later, the brand new hurricane windows in my magnificent panoramic view bedroom, leaked.  Since the leak occurred behind the large u-shaped dresser with a huge mirror on top, I did not notice that anything unusual was happening – until I smelled it.  Mold had developed under the plush carpet.  Mold UpstairsNext thing I knew, the mold remediaters came and swooped up the carpet, removed the dresser, closed off my huge walk-in closet and the 2nd upstairs bathroom. All the clothing that had been in the dresser drawers was now on top of an area in my office and boxes filled the hallway at the top of the staircase.

It took over 3 months before the place was back in order and the dresser was replaced.  During this fiasco I thought I would never feel good in that place again, but as soon as all was back in place I forgot about the previous turmoil.  That is, I felt fine until the unit owner decided to sell the place or rent it for a much higher fee than I was paying.  After some time, I was actually offered another opportunity to stay but by that point I was headed in a new direction.

This place had been quite good for me.  The space was more than three times larger than my previous apartment, directly on the ocean, in a much more upscale neighborhood, with high quality neighbors.  But there were some things I did not like about it.  The Feng Shui (energetic layout) of the rooms was not the best.  There were too many closed off spaces and walls which blocked the light and the energetic flow of the environment.But I would not have planned to move to find something better.

I could have been angry at the owner, upset with a “poor me” attitude because I had to move again.  Sure, for a short time I did feel that way.  And in the middle of the chaos of getting ready to move I did feel a twinge of annoyance.  And when I had not yet found a new place that appealed to me, I did become somewhat anxious.  But I kept repeating to myself that I am leaving something good for something better.

While experiencing all the problems with mold and chaos and workmen coming and going, I could have chosen to leave what had been good for something better.  But I chose to endure the chaos and remain.  What transpired in the end was that the timing of my move led me to look in a different neighborhood where I found a much more magnificent home than what I was leaving.  If I had pushed the situation and moved before I was propelled out of there, I am quite sure I would not have found the quality place I am now in.

Don’t Ask “What Do I Want?”

Before making a move from something good to something better, take as long a time as you need.  Don’t ask the obvious question, “What do I want?”, which may actually lead to the wrong decision.  When you ask this question you tend to become critical, judgmental,even demanding that you or someone else makes changes to meet your standards. And even if you get exactly what you want now, you will soon want something bigger, better, or more unique.

Ask instead: “What Skills Do I Need and How Can I Serve Others?”

Think like an artisan, a craftsman, a creator, and think outside the box.  Ask yourself the question that highly successful people ask time and again:  “What skills do I need to develop to create something that has not yet been created?”  “And how can I serve others with my new creation?”

My latest move is over and I could not be happier.  A few months ago, when faced with the prospect of packing up my belongings and moving, I couldn’t help wondering whether I would have to settle for something much less comfortable.

View from New Home

View from New Home

I could not possibly have known then that just the right space would become available for me.  But I know that I would have adjusted and found a way to enjoy my new place, no matter what.

The bottom line, taken from all the naysayers who claim that following your passion is not the path to success, is that it is not passion but skill that leads to success.  My living experiences have provided me with insight into what environments most suit my needs.  Without having lived in those previous places, I may not have realized the shortcomings of some of the homes I looked at.  I may have settled for one that seemed comfortable but not expansive and creatively inspiring.

I do not believe it is the best practice to leave something good for something better.  If a relationship is presenting problems and causing emotional upset, study the situation, get counseling, look beneath the surface, and do whatever you can to resolve the problems.  You will know when to leave because you will almost be propelled out of there.  The same applies to a job or career decision, a lifestyle choice or relocating to a different location.

Keep your day job.  Remain in your current committed relationship.  Don’t change your health care practitioner, move from your home, or quit your sports team.  First decide what new skills you need to develop, what new information you need to research, and how you might best be able to serve others.

Wait.  Have patience, tolerance, acceptance and a powerful vision.
You will be amazed at what transpires.

Do you tend to leave something good, or not so good, in the hopes of finding something better before developing the necessary skills for success?

Please share your thoughts and personal wisdom in the comments below.

Don’t struggle alone.Talk to me.

Read a healing book.

Listen to my healing words.

Warmly,

Dr. Erica

 

 

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Dr. Erica Goodstone is a Spiritual Relationship Healing Expert helping men and women heal their bodies and their relationships through love. Having presented her comprehensive relationship healing programs throughout the U.S. and Canada over several decades, she has helped literally 1000's of men and women to heal through learning how to love. Dr. Erica believes "Where There is Love There IS a Way". When you love, accept, listen and pay attention to your body, trust your own sense of what you truly desire, and strive to understand, appreciate and really know the other people in your life, anything and everything is possible.

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24 thoughts on “Leave Something Good … For Something Better

  1. The content within this blog was great and I fully believe in following your passion. I spent most of my life trying to get into medical school. I was in the middle of the acceptance process and I declined my meeting because it was not what I had a passion for anymore. It was a very tough decision for me just to throw that away, but I knew that becoming an entrepreneur was what I needed to do. I knew I could acquire the skills necessary to become successful and live the dream. Thank you for sharing and I look forward to getting to know you better!

    • Kyle,

      You made a life altering decision that day. Life as an MD is so different from being an entrepreneur. As an MD there are many rules and regulations, people you have to answer to, patients you may find difficult, staff to handle – so much to deal with that if you don’t feel passionate about it, that would not be a happy life. Being an entrepreneur also has its downside but if you are passionate and determined the fates are in your hand and you can answer to yourself.

      Warmly,

      Dr. Erica
      Dr. Erica Goodstone recently posted…All You Need Is LoveMy Profile

  2. Yes I definitely believe in following your passion…You cannot sustain and do something long term if you are not passionate about it.

    This is why I see plenty of online marketers failing or quitting because it was never something they where passionate about.

  3. Hi Erica,

    I really enjoyed reading your post. I’ve missed our conversations while you were in the moving process. I am also so happy for you that you found what you were looking for. I firmly believe that things happen for a reason and you were held back, just for the beautiful place you were meant to be living in now.

    Have a great day. Monna

  4. Awesome Dr. Erica!

    And so sorry to hear about your roof! Even more surprising and potentially damaging are so of those quotes!

    Hard to believe any respected experts would be advocating some of those quotes! In any event, I love advice about not asking “what do I want? Instead, asking what skills do I need to develop! Much better approach as far as I’m concerned!

    And love your view of the pond BTW! Truly awesome! Thanks for sharing!

    • Mark,
      There are different perspectives on what is the best approach to reach success in any given aspect of life. A Lot depends upon your own style and view of life. Some people are bigger risk takers than others. Staying in a situation, even longer than desired, can provide a sense of security (financial or emotional) and then when the moment feels right, a new world of possibilities is open to you.

      Warmly,
      Dr. Erica
      Dr. Erica Goodstone recently posted…Leave Something Good … For Something BetterMy Profile

  5. Asking how you can help others… definitely something I ask on a daily basis. A lot of my core business provides that, but I go further and give a lot because at one point in my career, there were no designers and developers openly sharing their knowledge, or the ones that were, they were only giving out part of it in order for everyone to get frustrated and just hire them…lol

    • Nile,

      What you just described is all to familiar to me. I took a course to learn Optimize Press and the instructor’s goal seemed to be to enroll students into her monthly paid program. So she started out my paid webinar with 2 separate polls – something you do on a free webinar intro – and then she used live examples and helped that person use the plugin. But this made it so confusing and difficult. When I wanted to create a banner and a background, I had to listen to 1 1/2 hours of the webinar to locate the exact place where she touched upon that topic. What could have been taught in a clear and concise way, and maybe I would have also enrolled in the monthly program, was taught in a hodge podge confusing way causing me frustration.

      Warmly,
      Dr. Erica

  6. Hello Dr Erica, I to was amazed at the different quotes that you found! Wow, this one really stuck out for me and I am going to share this one tonight..“Don’t do what you love, learn to love what you do….What a Great message…

    I am so happy for you, I can remember reading about all your challenges in the past and must admit that it sounds like you have made the perfect choice.. Thanks for sharing.. Chery :))

    • Chery,
      If we first embrace and find a way to love what we have, that energy attracts more of what we love to come to us. We don’t have to go searching for it. Love is always the key, allowing it and being it, instead of pursuing it.
      Warmly,
      Dr. Erica

  7. Erica, what a lovely article and it has really spoken to me….We are in a place where we now have just over 2 weeks left, we were only planning to be here a few months and in decision, and being concerned about where next stopped us…so I can really feel your story and although this is not my life experience in all areas it is present when it comes to ‘home’ – luckily we are moving to Spain and are looking forward to a change in lifestyle and vista…as well as weather…I do think it is a balance between leaping and not making a move too prematurely, sometimes however you just have to make a move and take A BIG risk as one area of life that gets grounded impacts on ALL as I have experienced!

  8. I’m so glad you found another great place to live Erica! I’ve also heard so many people say to follow your passion – especially when it comes to a home business. I think it’s terrible when someone leaves their job the minute they start making a little money from their business, instead of waiting until they can actually replace their current income.

    I was surprised at those quotes you found, but glad they’ve been written!

    • Julieanne,

      I was also surprised, at first, by those quotes saying the opposite of “Follow your passion.” But in thinking about it, I realized that following your passion can lead to long periods, sometimes years, sometimes a lifetime, of struggle and uncertainty. Think of people pursuing an artistic or theatrical career and barely making ends meet for years. Those that finally make it can say with pride that it was worth it, but many others just continue a life of struggle. For most of us, a bit of balance can go a long way – holding on to a job or career that you don’t feel passionate and excited about but that you function adequately at and receive adequate compensation for. You can then have the resources needed to slowly pursue your passion and help it to grow.

      Warmly,
      Dr. Erica

  9. Great article Dr. Erica. I am surprised at some of the quotes though. I would have thought it would be more of a positive spin. I do think that sometimes our passion for something leads us to not think as clearly as we should. Passion is great but the necessary skill to achieve what ever it is you want to do is also very important. There seem to be so many ingredients that go into being successful online.

    I think most marketers keep their day jobs until the reach whatever goals they set for themselves. That allows us to become a student of the game and acquire the necessary skillset to succeed. This article has been very insightful. Thank you for sharing.

    • Nathaniel,

      I was also surprised by those quotes. That’s what inspired me to include them in the discussion. Everything involves skill, even the skill to know when is the right time to stay and when to leave any situation, opportunity, relationship or activity. Leaving too soon or staying too long, each have their own consequences.

      Warmly,
      Dr. Erica

  10. Great article Dr. Erica but I have to say those quotations are really sad – and by that I mean what a depressing philosophy on life! Having worked as a small business coach for years I have known more than a few people who jumped from one “opportunity” to another always looking for something better, bigger (easier), and in that regard I absolutely agree.

    Still, when I think of how different – how much smaller – my life would have been had I not reached for something better, unreasonable, unpractical, well I bless those who prefer to live within the safety of their comfort zone, but until the day I kick the bucket I’ll be pushing the walls of mine. Thanks for the great read!

    • Marty,

      I believe it is all about timing as well as our unique capacity for risk. When staying where we are becomes more painful than leaving, then it is a no-brainer to just take the leap into the unknown. But when a situation is somewhat comfortable, it is important to carefully evaluate the benefits and liabilities of making changes and actually leaving.

      Warmly,
      Dr. Erica

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